Monday 26 December 2016

Personal Essay



The lessons we take from failure can be fundamental to later success. Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?

"Sweet are the uses of adversity", says the Bard of bards (As you like it, Act 2, scene 1, line 12 – Duke Senior). The transfixing insights of the most controversial of the figures, Osho, reveal that man reaches the very depth of his being during the doldrums. Just as we tip-toe towards the great castle of the sullen Satan, Dame Gabriel stands at the menacing turnstile and presents us with two choices; either to succumb to the persecution or to endure the scorching heat and paralyzing pressure and transmute into a diamond. After all a choice is not imperative but instead implies free will.

A traveller cannot help but distinguish a pasture that has been recently reaped. In my case I, the traveller, stand gaping at the meadow upon which I had toiled. My fiscal status maintains that it is a feat much beyond the most feral of the imaginations to study in the US. I spent my junior year preparing for the Indian entrance examination called JEE. My school counselor, parents and teachers had coaxed me to prepare for the SAT and had asked me to ‘write the SAT without dwelling upon the nature of the outcomes.’ Somehow this advice struck the cords of my lyre at the inceptions of my senior year. Due to the expanse of the work load (JEE, 12th preparation and SAT 1 and 2) and time constraints I had to make the audacious choice of halting JEE and 12th preparation for time being. A hiatus in JEE and 12th preparation by default means that I’m locked out of the best of institutes of India. I stood on the razors edge posed with the inner conflict of whether the decision I took was correct. Were I to succeed on the SAT I, I would make an irradiant career, but if I failed I would have to embrace perpetual struggles to sore high.

I recall the philosophical poet Robert Frost.

“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveller.”

You would be expecting by now that I would write about how I achieved an elusive SAT score. Well, being inspired by Lemony Snicket I’m here writing about ‘A series of Unfortunate Events’. You will also see in time that I mimic O Henry’s conclusions – but “this assertion will be illumined later” as he puts in The Gift of Magi.

‘Fortunately’ I failed to achieve my target score on ‘both’ SAT 1 and 2. You already know what eerie secrets the failure had to reveal. I was dejected and torn apart. The life seemed to be doomed and I was drowning in the fathomless ocean of frustration. 

But the wagon of life had to move on. With the indispensible support of my parents, mentors and peers I recovered. Failure has served as a whetstone to my wit - proliferating and augmenting the ‘inquisitive trickle’ - on its unending quest - through every nerve, from the perennial stream of abundant knowledge abound by the unbounded universe. This experience completely shattered my ego of being able to ‘solely reign’ my life. Today I concede that there is some omnipotent power greater and wiser than me. It knows what is best for me. My myopic vision expanded and the putrid pond disappeared. I became more humble. I was addicted to success. This failure made me realize that the lessons learnt in failure cannot be learnt otherwise. The snaring flares and gnashing teeth of failure have melted down and bitten off the colossal halls of ignorance illuminating the murkiest cores with its startling radiance. Now I see that cataclysms cannot undermine the inherent potential. In fact real failure lies in the acceptance of it. I discerned to hear the innumerable opportunities knocking at my door instead of being deaf to them. Success brews in the pot of ‘self-respect and trust in the universal power’, no matter what occurs, that Neville Goddard talks about. “If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs (poem if)” and advance, just like a Phoenix you rise from your own ashes! 

Armed with this newly acquired awareness I headed off to conquer Indian colleges, leaving behind US. I met Kiran sir, the director of S.N.Kansagra, on 29th December 4.00pm who changed my fate for the good and provided me with a catalogue of colleges. I took the final call and started my application process on 30th noon. The lack of sufficient time made me an acute decision maker and an efficient worker capable of managing stress. The inexorable trust in myself, unflinching efforts to the ‘last minute’ and above all the paramount support of my counselor, Shrenik sir, and the teachers (Wilma mam, Mayank sir and Nishat Mam) who wrote recommendation letters for me have made the impossible task of completing the application in 46 hours, possible! 

“Two roads diverged in a wood and, and I
I took the one less travelled by,
And that has made all the difference.”

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